Bob, see you later! - Los Angeles Photographer

I have to prefix that this is not my normal post. I was reading an article about traveling in Ireland and it reminded me of Bob, an Irish descend.

Bob was my professor in graduate school.  He gave me a few "A"s and I hated it when he gave me a "B".  I was in a few of his classes and he would normally not say much.  He'd ask questions to "probe" around and see if he would hit a sparkle from someone in his class.

Bob was a cancer survivor.  From all I could see, he looked normal.  He said he had cut down on red meat.

A few of us students grew close to him.  We would share aspirations with him and ask questions about our career.  As usual, Bob would not say much.  He'd listen and smile.

After graduation, life took us in a wind-swirl.  But we kept in touch with Bob.  I'd get an e-mail from him once every few months or years.  I'd be so happy to reply right away and to only hear from him again months or years later.  Every time I changed job, Bob would be happy to be my reference and not ask or say much.

Last summer, a friend mentioned that she got an e-mail about keeping Bob in the prayer at the end of 2009.  I said to myself, if anything happened to Bob, it'd be so significant that I'd know about it.

So today, when I realized that it's been a really long time since I heard from Bob, I went and searched for Bob's e-mail.  The last that I heard from him was an e-mail forward in June 2009.   I decided to take one step further and Google searched him.

My heart started wrenching and my stomach churning.  I so hoped that the obituary on the top was not you, Bob.  When I saw your picture, I was so not ready for the emotions that follow.

Bob, you've always known me better than I do.  Through years of growth, I now finally understand the wisdom that you so casually uttered.

I remember, one time, when I so excitedly told you about the offers that I got from two of the "Big 4".  You replied, "go to the one with the higher signing bonus".  At the time, it seemed such an inappropriate attitude to such a serious decision.  But, seeing me putting myself through the wild chase in the rat race, did you know that I was meant for something else?  And yet, you watched and let me go through life in my chosen path.

Bob, I am finally where my heart is and, seriously, I don't take myself that seriously anymore.  But Bob, all the learning in life did not prepare me for this moment.   

I'm confused.  How can I still have years of e-mails from you when you are not with us anymore?  How can you check out early when you are one of the influences that shaped me into who I am today?

Bob, I know it will be hard to accept for a long time that you are somewhere else now.  And I want to thank you for being there all these years.

I know you loved horses.  Do you have horses up there?  Here's one for you, captured and processed with my new found talent/passion (and hope that you have internet up there too):

Grazing Horse - ©Jean Huang Photography

P.S. Had it been an article for our class, how would you grade it? ;-)  Thanks for teaching me how to write!

The sign of any fresh start is exciting - Los Angeles Photographer

I'm a big believer in maximizing the utility of anything before putting it back to the environment.  Needless to say, I recycle papers and reuse plastic bags, etc.  Once in a while, when I use vegetables in the kitchen, I'd imagine the possibilities of growing them in my garden.  Therefore, I save seeds.

The other day, I remembered some that I kept since last year.  Not thinking much of the season, I planted them and was instantly rewarded with the nice little faces of these sprouts.  How cute they are (remember, I'm a photographer that sees cuteness or beauty in most anything)?  

Do I remember what I planted?  No.  Would I worry if I'd get fruits from them?  Not really, although it'll be nice.  I don't worry about the end results as much as I want to enjoy the process and make sure to put in the due effort (Hey, I "single-handedly" brought these lives into this world.  I'd need to be responsible.).  With anything, I believe that if I do enough of right things, the positive energy will go around and eventually come as rewards as I least expect it.

What do you think?  Would love to hear your thoughts.

P.S. I am curious though how this plant will turn out to be.  I know it's a squash type.  So, would it be a pumpkin, a cucumber, a winter melon or something else that I happened to stash the seeds away last year?  Anybody with a green thumb can tell? :-)

Do you know your lifetime dream(s)? - Los Angeles Portrait and Fine-Art Photographer

I still remember in the days of my corporate life, I'd say things like "when I retire, I would ...".  It seemed that I was saving the best things in life until my "golden years".  It seemed as if the life before retirement was supposed to be lacking, and suffering through it was part of the "package" that came with life. Well, things do not always go with plans and who would have known that I could change?  I changed, way before I reached retirement age.  Somewhere along the line, I started looking within to search for happiness and contentment.  So today, when I read the blog post "Before I Die - What is Important to You" by public installation artist, designer, urban planner, and co-founder of Civic Center  Candy Chang, I felt a sense of relief.  As I tried to reflect on the things that I wanted to achieve over the years, I am happy that I did not wait for a "perfect time" to act on them.

We may be able to plan our retirement; we won't know when our last day is in this world.  So what's on your list the things that you always wanted to do and yet life gets in the way?  Since waiting does not seem to be a good option, make plans to start allowing room to act on your "dreams".  

So what my dream life was like years ago, you may ask.  I wanted to lead a creative life and travel around the world.  And today, far ahead of my supposed "retirement age", I am creating as a photographer and oil painter (and many other ways of creating to come), and my passion for travel has taken me to many corners of the world.  And yet, what's more fulfilling is that I'm able to contribute to a positive life experience to my clients by bringing beauty to their lives or reminding them of such beauty.  I wouldn't have asked for my life any other way.

So today, allow yourself 5 minutes of your busy life to sit down and complete this sentence: "Before I die, I want to ____________".  Look forward to your sharing!

P.S. As I was deep in the drafting of this post, a friend that hasn't called for years rang.  As you would've expected, she was shocked (to say the least) at my changes.  It'll be interesting to find out her husband's reaction when she tells him first thing back home.  Hehe...